Angelina Jolie 3

Better Than Chuck Norris:

1. After consumation of the sex act, Angelina devours her mates.
2. Angelina Jolie’s doctor takes her temperature with a Kelvin thermometer.
3. Angelina can start brushfires by walking across grass.*
4. Dolphins and whales frequently beach themselves in an attempt to see Angelina suntanning.
5. Angelina Jolie is being deployed to Afghanistan. The mere sight of her will cause Al Qaida members to die from their unstoppable erections.
6. Every poet who has tried to describe her lips has died from the impossibility of finding the proper adjectives.
7. Global warming occurs every time Angelina Jolie does a shower scene in a movie.
8. Old Faith isn’t a geyser; it’s the Earth ejaculating from the mere presence of Angelina Jolie.*
9. Angelina’s thighs can squeeze coal into diamonds.*
10. So can her lips.
11. “Don’t rock the boat” does not apply to Angelina Jolie. She rocks every boat.
12. Angelina Jolie’s lips can be used as a flotation device.
13. After Angelina Jolie was born, 50% of the world’s hottest women committed suicide out of respect.
14. Helen of Troy launched a 1,000 ships. Angelina Jolie slept with every one of the sailors.
15. Marilyn Monroe died so Angelina could show the rest of the women how it’s done.
16. Angelina Jolie taught Jell-O how to wiggle.
17. Angelina Jolie’s pictures have never appeared on “Am I Hot or Not?” Their rating scale doesn’t allow exponents.
18. Angelina once did her Kegel Exercises in the Pacific Ocean. The resulting tsunami left thousands of Sri Lankans homeless.
19. Hard water is caused by Angelina Jolie bathing in it.
20. Sex asks Angelina for tips.

TomC

Angelina Jolie 2

One post just was not enough, and how bout some random facts to go with it:

• One of People Magazine's 50 Most Beautiful People in the year 2000.
• Named the world's sexiest woman in Swedish magazine Cafe.
• She is extremely close to and protective of her brother Jamie. He often accompanies her to awards shows, and she used his name, or at least his memory, as inspiration in the "Where's Jamie?!" scene in Girl, Interrupted (1999).
• Has the letter 'H' tattooed on the inside of her left wrist, which is a reference to two people she is close to who have this letter in their names: her brother, James Haven, and Timothy Hutton. She got the tattoo when she was dating Timothy but since their break up she now says it's only for James.
• Has a tattoo of the Tennesee Williams quote, "A prayer for the wild at heart, kept in cages", on her left forearm.
• Has the Latin phrase "Quod me nutrit me destruit" (What nourishes me also destroys me) tattooed across her stomach.
• Her other tattoos include the Japanese sign for death, two pointy black American Indian symbols, a dragon, and a large black cross.
• Jolie is actually her middle name.
• Was married to Jonny Lee Miller in a black leather pants and a white shirt. On the white shirt she painted her husband's name in her own blood (across the back).
• Mother is Marcheline Bertrand.
• Father is Jon Voight.
• Goddaughter of actress Jacqueline Bisset.
• Majored in film at New York University.
• Collects knives and has an interest in mortuary science.
• Had the childhood dream of becoming a funeral director.
• "Jolie" means "pretty" in French.
• Appointed Goodwill Ambassador for the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees in Geneva, Switzerland after her visits to Sierra Leone, Tanzania and Pakistan on 27 August 2001.
• Is of Czechoslovakian, English, and Native American heritage.
• Performed her own stunts in 'Tomb Raider' and received cuts from the chandelier scene as a result.

TomC

Angelina Jolie 1

Angelina Jolie (born June 4, 1975) is an American film actress, a former fashion model, and a Goodwill Ambassador for the UN Refugee Agency. She is often cited by popular media as one of the world's most beautiful women and her off-screen life is widely reported. She has received three Golden Globe Awards, two Screen Actors Guild Awards, and an Academy Award.

After appearing as a child alongside her father Jon Voight in the 1982 film Lookin' to Get Out, Jolie's acting career began in earnest a decade later with the low budget production Cyborg 2 (1993) and she played her first leading role in a major film in Hackers (1995). She appeared in the critically acclaimed biographical films George Wallace (1997) and Gia (1998), and won an Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress for her performance in the drama Girl, Interrupted (1999). She achieved international fame as a result of her portrayal of videogame heroine Lara Croft in Lara Croft: Tomb Raider (2001), and since then has established herself as one of the best known and highest paid actresses in Hollywood. She had her biggest commercial success with the action-comedy Mr. & Mrs. Smith (2005).

Divorced from actors Jonny Lee Miller and Billy Bob Thornton, Jolie currently lives with actor Brad Pitt, in a relationship that has attracted worldwide media attention. Jolie and Pitt have three adopted children, Maddox, Pax and Zahara, and a biological child, Shiloh. Jolie has promoted humanitarian causes throughout the world, and is noted for her work with refugees through UNHCR.

TomC